Fall in Love With You: 10 Ways to Start Loving Yourself
Self-love is a crucial part of overall well-being, and it’s important that all of us learn how to show ourselves some love and appreciation
Do you struggle with self-love? Many of us do. In today’s world, it’s easy to start feeling negative about yourself; you might find yourself comparing yourself to others, or talking to yourself using negative words that you’d never say to a close friend.
But self-love is a crucial part of overall well-being, and it’s important that all of us learn how to show ourselves some love and appreciation.
Here are 10 ways to fall in love with yourself this autumn.
Stop comparing
One important practice to adopt when trying to build self-love is to stop comparing yourself to others. Understand that what others are doing — how they dress, how much weight they’ve lost, what promotions they’ve received — has nothing to do with you and the unique trajectory of your life.
On top of that, we never really know what’s truly going on under the surface. It could be that you’re simply comparing your worst insecurities to their best moments — which isn’t a fair comparison at all.
Speak kindly to yourself
We usually treat other people so much more kindly than we treat ourselves. If a dear friend were to make a mistake, you’d probably try to comfort and reassure them. But if you were to make the same mistake, you may not be so forgiving of yourself. You may even be unkind to yourself, and call yourself cruel names.
Practice kind self-talk. Notice when you’re being cruel to yourself, and change the narrative. Speak to yourself as if you would a dear friend. It might feel silly at first, but it’s an important step toward self-love.
Know your strengths
We all have unique strengths — but whether you’re aware of your own strengths or not is a different story.
What are your strengths? What are the parts of yourself that you’re most proud of? Nothing is too small to mention; perhaps you love how kind you are to animals, or really like the way your eyes look when you smile. Maybe you’re proud of how you handled a certain situation at work. Write down as many strengths as you can.
If this is difficult for you, then don’t be afraid to ask a friend for help. Knowing what others appreciate about you may make it easier to learn what your strengths are.
Choose to be around affirming people
Who you choose to spend your time with makes a big difference in how you feel overall. Are you spending your time with affirming people who make you feel good about yourself?
This doesn’t mean that your loved ones won’t need to tell you some hard truths sometimes. But overall, spending time with the people in your life should make you feel good about yourself. If you’re finding that you consistently feel bad about yourself when you spend time with someone, then it may be time to examine your relationship.
Reject perfectionism
So many of us are perfectionists. This can be a positive quality in certain situations, but it can also come with some negative side effects — like being extra-hard on ourselves when we don’t deserve it.
Try to catch yourself when you’re being perfectionistic, and reject these tendencies when they’re not serving you. Be wary of expecting perfection to the extent that you’re disqualifying any positive thing you accomplish
Practice Self Gratitude
Usually, when we think about gratitude, we tend to think of gratitude for other people and things in our lives. But you can practice gratitude for yourself, too.
Practicing gratitude for your body is a good place to start. You were created in the image of God, and your body is an amazing miracle. Learn how to send gratitude and affection to every part of your body for everything it does for you.
For example, reflect on your eyes, and foster gratitude for how they allow you to read, see your loved one’s smiles, and view beautiful sunsets. Practice gratitude for your arms — how they allow you to hug your family.
Treat Yourself
Self-care is about a lot more than pampering. True self-care is about meeting your physical, emotional, social, and spiritual needs — like exercising, eating nourishing meals, and going to therapy.
But treating yourself with something special every now and then doesn’t hurt. Celebrate yourself as you would a dear friend on a special day. The important thing is to remind yourself that you deserve to be treated and celebrated.
Nourish your body
Self-love is about loving your body, too. One of the best ways to show love to your body is to nourish it with healthy foods. As they say, you are what you eat. If you fill your body with junk, then you probably won’t feel very good about yourself. You may even start to feel sick.
It’s okay to allow yourself some special treats sometimes, even if they’re “unhealthy.” But pay attention to how the food you eat makes you feel. Show love and caring to yourself by feeding it healthy foods, just like you’d feed a young child.
Master a skill
Building mastery over specific skills can go a long way in helping you increase your sense of self-love and competence.
What’s an activity or skill that you’ve always wanted to learn? It could be anything, from learning a new language to competing in a triathlon. Practice the skill every day until you feel confident in your abilities.
You don’t have to be the best in the world. But mastering a skill to the best of your abilities can make you feel more confident in your perseverance.
Write in a journal
Lastly, writing in a journal can help you to get to know yourself on a deeper level — and self-awareness is the first step to self-love. Especially by following specific journaling prompts, you can explore your past experiences and how they’ve shaped who you are today.
If you’re feeling stuck on how to start journaling, check out our Story Of My Life journaling guide. This self-guided journal can help you identify both healthy and unhealthy patterns in your behavior in hopes of restoring a positive sense of self.
